A week today...

... my second operation will be over.

It is constantly in my thoughts to the point that I woke this morning at 5.30am, and then 7am on the dot. I will have to get up at 5.30am next week and I am due at hospital at 7am. How is my body clock so fine tuned to wake me up at these exact times? Are my thoughts never switched off?

I'm obviously nervous, but I'm also just anxious for it to be over so that my next treatment can be decided.  As soon as the infection is treated I should finally start feeling better. Healthy.

Removing metal work is an unpredictable operation; until they begin unscrewing each screw the surgeons don't know how it will go.  Some may be easy to remove, others not so -  I just pray mine are all fine.  I have complete trust in the surgeons and the Bone Infection Unit physicians who will take over my care once the operation is finished and so, my nerves are not really related to how the operation itself will go; I am nervous that they somehow won't find infection.  If they don't,  I am back to square one.

I know that this is extremely unlikely but, as there is still a chance I can't seem to stop myself dwelling on it.  They won't know until they operate and take the samples as I explained in my post How the infection is being treated .

While this worry has been getting me down, I have also now channelled my thinking into how the operation is a positive thing, regardless of the outcome.  From the CT scan of my thoracic spine the surgeons know that I have screws very close to, or maybe interfering with, nerves.  Having these screws removed will greatly improve my pain, and will mean that, hopefully, I can stop taking the neuropathic painkillers.  As amazing as these tablets have been over the past couple of months, taking them has been no walk in the park and I will also be glad to not have to remember to take them three times a day!

All in all, this week cannot go quick enough and I am looking forward to finishing this stage of 'operation: get better' so that I can move on to the next...